


Bebop the Fuckbot

by Yognautical (KiiKitsune)



Category: The Yogscast
Genre: Bad Porn, M/M, Milking, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-22
Updated: 2014-08-22
Packaged: 2018-02-14 07:43:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2183562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiiKitsune/pseuds/Yognautical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>That one where Parv finds Will's terrible self-insert fanfiction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bebop the Fuckbot

Boredom took Parv adventuring often. His latest outing has been a gruelling dungeon crawl that drained him completely. Luckily, his return trip took him rather close to the Strife Solutions complex.

 

Will might have claimed that he only went to Parv to get away from work, but Parv knew Will liked his company. The businessman wouldn’t mind an impromptu visit.

 

Touching down, Parv called out to him. There was no reply.

 

Parv hadn’t spent much time at the complex, so he poked around for a bit, occasionally calling out Will’s name. The place was silent, save for the whirr of machines. Eventually he found himself in the main tower, in what looked like Will’s bedroom. It was pretty sparce; nothing but a computer desk, a chair, a nearly empty bookshelf, and the bed itself.

 

Parv skimmed the book titles on the shelf. Nothing interesting. Nothing fun. Just like Will.

 

The computer was still humming away; a pair of sunglasses bouncing around as a screen saver. Parv wiggled the mouse. Will’s background was his company logo. Predictable. There were a few tabs open at the bottom though. Parv clicked one.

 

“Oh, hello.” Parv snickered, quickly minimizing the image of the anime girl being fucked in a highly probably position by a ridiculous number of tentacles. “Diiirty, dirty Williekins. Who knew you liked that sort of thing?”

 

The next tab Parv opened was a word document.

 

Parv read the screen. His eyebrows raised. He scrolled down. His eyebrows raised further.

 

\--

 

_With the increase in witches and magic users all over the server, I thought it would be prudent to set up a milking machine. Milk cures all debuffs, which is handy when someone lays a curse on you. I rounded up some cows, but there was no way I’d spend all my time milking them by hand. As a CEO I had better things to do. Setting up an automatic system would also be time consuming, so I took to the internet instead. Pre-made systems were a bit beneath me but, seeing as how it was just an auxiliary thing and not of any real importance, I figured I could let myself relax just this once._

_By the time the package arrived at my door I’d forgotten I’d ordered it. Lousy cross-universe shipping services. Anyways, the box was huge; nearly as tall as me, and weighed about twice as much. The label simply read ‘Milk Machine-modelBBVX”. I dragged it into my workshop and opened it there._

_What I found inside was not what I had expected. At all._

_The machine was humanoid in shape. Right down to the… faucet that sprung forth from a nest of wires connecting to its pelvic plating. I gaped for a moment before I dragged my eyes upwards again. There was a small red button on the robot’s chest with a tiny black power symbol on it. Hesitantly, I reached out and pressed the button. The robot’s visor flickered to life and the entire body straightened up. There was a pause and then…_

_“Hello! BebopVox, at your service!”_

 

\--

 

Parv squinted. “Wait… Does Bebop even have a dong…?”

 

\--

 

_“I. Uh. Hello?”_

_“You know it’s rude not to introduce yourself.”_

_“Oh. I’m Will Strife, CEO of Strife Solutions. You sure have a lot of… personality, for a robot.”_

_Bebop made a strange sound, something like an electronic huff, and put his hands on his hips. “Rude.”_

_The action only served to draw my attention back down._

_Noticing my gaze, Bebop wrapped his metallic fingers around his phallus and gave it a stroke. “So are we going to get to milking, or what?”_

_Shocked, I felt my face heating up. “W-what?!”_

 

\--

 

“Oh no.”

 

\--

 

_“That’s what I’m here for, isn’t it?” With his free hand he reached out and grabbed my wrist, pulling my hand to his tube. The metal was cool to the touch, but the red wires connecting to various ports along the length were pleasantly warm. I found myself grasping tightly just to feel it more fully against my hand._

_Bebop’s visor displayed a smiley emoji._

_“That feels good.”_

_“You can feel?”_

_“I have 253 pleasure sensors that mimic human nerve endings in my dick alone.”_

_I flushed, the thought of such a responsive robot enough to kick my imagination into overdrive. Stroking experimentally, I noted the slight tremor that wracked Bebop’s frame._

_His hips pistoned into my grip, fucking the tight ring of my fingers._

_“Wait,” I said, shifting my weight between my feet nervously, “I want to try something…”_

_I dropped to my knees, coming face-to-face with the thick shaft of the robot. Muttering, I said, “I haven’t done this since college…”_

_Then I took the tip in my mouth._

_“Oh yeah~”_

\--

 

“Oh NO.”

 

\--

 

_“Y-zzt-yo-tz-You should get a bucket, o-o-o-o-r this milk i-i-i-i-is going to ge-ge-get everywhere,” Bebop said, his voice fizzing out a glitching randomly._

_I smirked up at him with my mouth still stretched around him. “I’ll just have to drink it all.”_

 

\--

 

“How do you smirk with a cock in your mouth? Better yet, how do you talk?”

 

\--

 

_The robot cradled my head with both hands, holding me steady as he thrust forward into my willing mouth. I used my tongue to play with the wires. The shaft began to vibrate in my throat, sending pleasure racing down straight to my dick. I’d never been so hard in my life._

 

\--

 

“I think your anime girls would be offended at that, Will.”

 

\--

 

_Suddenly a gush of cold liquid shot down my throat. Bebop continued pumping, forcing milk to spill out of my mouth and down my chin. I tried to swallow it, but there was just too much. Closing my eyes, I took it, tasting the sweet liquid and letting it seep all down my front. My clothes were completely soaked by time he pulled back and sprayed the last of it across my chest._

_I gasped for breath, sitting in a small pool of milk._

_Bebop crouched down in front of me and palmed at my erection through my pants. “I want you to milk me again… but this time with your ass.”_

 

\--

 

“WHAT.”

 

\--

 

_“Wh-What?”_

_Bebop pushed me onto my back and stripped me of all my wet clothes. Naked and hard, I was too turned on to try and stop him. He swiped his fingers through the milk puddle before pressing the digits to my entrance._

 

\--

 

“Milk is not lube, Will. MILK IS NOT LUBE.”

 

\--

 

_He worked his fingers into me. First one, then a second. He scissored a few times, then added a third._

_“You’re going to fast!” I breathed, shaking uncontrollably as he worked my hole. My knees tried to close of their own accord, but he forced them apart again._

_“You can take it. You’re a CEO aren’t you?”_

_“Y-Yeah,” I said, “I can do it.”_

 

\--

 

“Oh my god Will, you’re even pretentious in your porn. What does being a CEO even have to do with taking it up the bum?

 

\--

_He entered me in one swift motion, cool metal against my hot insides. I was stretched to my limit. The burn felt amazing. He thrust and sparks danced across my vision._

_I groaned as he pulled in an out of me, fucking me into the floor without slowing down even once. His machinery let him keep up a brutal pace where a human would have faltered._

_My own cock bobbed, huge and red against my belly. All 10 inches of it throbbing._

 

\--

 

“I’ve seen you in the shower, mate. I think the word you’re looking for is ‘centimeters’.”

 

\--

 

_“Such a slut for my milk. Gonna fill you to the brim. Make you my cum bucket!”_

_“AH- I- I can’t take any more! KYA~”_

 

\--

 

“‘KYA~’? Really? You couldn’t at least think of a manlier sound effect? Like ‘HUA’ or ‘HRRG’ or-”

 

“Hrrg?”

 

Parv jumped, swivelling around to see Will standing in the doorway. The man looked from Parvis to the computer then, realizing what was on screen, bounded across the room in two huge steps and slapped the ‘off’ button so hard it nearly knocked the monitor off the desk.

 

“YOU WILL NEVER SPEAK OF THIS.”

 

Parv snickered, trying to hold in a full blow laugh, “I don’t know-”

 

“NEVER!”

 

The dam broke and Parv burst out laughing. He doubled over with the force of it, tears leaking out of his eyes. Will kicked him a few times but he couldn’t stop.

 

“Get the hell out of my tower, Parvis!”

 

Still cackling, Parv slowly staggered out of the building, leaving Will alone.

 

Dragging his hand down his face, Will schooled his embarrassment back to controllable levels. He put his computer back in its place and turned the monitor on again. At least Parv hadn’t found the sequel: Brent the Milkman Cums for a Visit.


End file.
